People believe they have depression, that they are depressed. This is what they are told; this is the label they are given and which they then impose upon themselves. I have thoughts, emotions, behaviors which, without thinking, I might call "depressive" in nature, but, like I said, and as I say throughout my book, this is a label upon myself which prohibits me from observing further or going deeper to understand what this "depression" actually is. One can develop a technique of self-observation that helps to "get underneath" our feelings, thoughts, behaviors, and allows us to see what is really happening.
I thought about changing the subtitle for this blog to Seeking Something Greater Than Ourselves, for That Is What We Are, but then I realized that people have what they call depression for many different reasons. I realized that, for me, symptoms of "depression" occur when I am no longer engaged in seeking to understand what life is, where I belong in the world and the cosmos. For I have recognized, at least at this point, that the quest for meaning, in itself, delivers us from ourselves, from imprisonment within our small, limited version of ourselves and our lives, for it is an act of faith in ourselves as something much greater than our mere existence and the world in which we believe we live.
So, our depression is not our depression. That's a tautology, a false statement, circular reasoning that says we are depressed because we are depressive, which is ridiculous. There is so much more to us. These symptoms that we call depression can actually lead us somewhere that we want to be, can actually give us knowledge about ourselves and our lives, and about living life in this cosmos. If we are willing to attend to ourselves and where we go with ourselves, we can learn much. Life is not any easier, I don't think, but it sure is more interesting. Self-understanding is not eating shit, as it were; it's beyond that. Most people prefer to remain in a state which would be labeled depressed because, as difficult and as painful as it may be, it is predictable and therefore comfortable in its predictability. "I know I will feel awful and that I will suffer," has a safety to it. Understanding why it is awful and why we suffer helps us to not believe everything we think and not to think everything we believe. In other words, we can break the endless looping cycle we are in. This doesn't mean that we are no longer very sensitive or that we have episodes of profound sorrow or loss, but it does mean that, finally, we can see a bit of ourselves and have a some mercy or even a sense of humor that we could not experience before.
I thought about changing the subtitle for this blog to Seeking Something Greater Than Ourselves, for That Is What We Are, but then I realized that people have what they call depression for many different reasons. I realized that, for me, symptoms of "depression" occur when I am no longer engaged in seeking to understand what life is, where I belong in the world and the cosmos. For I have recognized, at least at this point, that the quest for meaning, in itself, delivers us from ourselves, from imprisonment within our small, limited version of ourselves and our lives, for it is an act of faith in ourselves as something much greater than our mere existence and the world in which we believe we live.
So, our depression is not our depression. That's a tautology, a false statement, circular reasoning that says we are depressed because we are depressive, which is ridiculous. There is so much more to us. These symptoms that we call depression can actually lead us somewhere that we want to be, can actually give us knowledge about ourselves and our lives, and about living life in this cosmos. If we are willing to attend to ourselves and where we go with ourselves, we can learn much. Life is not any easier, I don't think, but it sure is more interesting. Self-understanding is not eating shit, as it were; it's beyond that. Most people prefer to remain in a state which would be labeled depressed because, as difficult and as painful as it may be, it is predictable and therefore comfortable in its predictability. "I know I will feel awful and that I will suffer," has a safety to it. Understanding why it is awful and why we suffer helps us to not believe everything we think and not to think everything we believe. In other words, we can break the endless looping cycle we are in. This doesn't mean that we are no longer very sensitive or that we have episodes of profound sorrow or loss, but it does mean that, finally, we can see a bit of ourselves and have a some mercy or even a sense of humor that we could not experience before.
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